The Hidden Reasons We Avoid the Work That Matters

I have been reflecting on how I am doing with the priorities I set for 2026. These priorities are not New Year’s resolutions; they are things I genuinely want to achieve before the end of the year. Priorities like publishing my new book, aligning activities at Unsinkable (the charity I founded) with its original mission, going to two retreats that support my spiritual growth, and starting a book club focused on personal growth.

As the year got underway, I realized I had not made tremendous progress on the things I identified as priorities. I set these priorities because they express my talents, they fulfill me, and they contribute to the greater purpose I have in my work. In other words, this work is really important to me.

So why haven’t I made notable progress on the things I say are important?

As I took an honest look at what has held me back, I started to think more broadly about what has held me back in the past. Maybe some of these thoughts and habits are more universal. Maybe some of them are things you can relate to as keeping you stuck, or unable to do the work necessary to realize your priorities.

And so here are a few thoughts and habits that have kept me stuck at various times in my life. Some of them are relevant to my lack of progress recently, and some are things that have prevented progress in the past.

The first, and most insidious, is: I am not good enough. This one can have so many specific iterations, all of them limiting our lives.

I don’t have time.

There are too many obstacles, and this must mean I am on the wrong path.

There are too many obstacles, and so I give up (temporarily).

Distraction. The kitchen needs cleaning. This friend needs me to visit. These emails need returning. There are so many productive things we can do that move us away from our biggest priority.

Avoiding routines that require initial effort (like getting out of bed early to work on the project).

Getting feedback too early in the project. Getting feedback from the wrong people.

Spending too much time doing things that are fun, but don’t provide long-term satisfaction.

Losing confidence and then avoiding the work.

Deciding the work is too hard.

Convincing myself that the work is not important.

My sister is visiting and needs all my time (or a friend, or a brother, or a colleague).

I don’t have the skills to do this.

I won’t find the tools, or the people, to help me achieve this priority.

This priority isn’t important after all.

I don’t have time (worth repeating).

Seeing these thoughts written out reminds me how easily they can take over when the work truly matters. They are subtle, persuasive, and often sound reasonable. But when they remain unnamed, they quietly keep us from the very things we say are important.

Progress, I am learning, does not come from waiting for clarity, confidence, or perfect conditions. It comes from returning, again and again, to what matters, and choosing to take the next small step forward.